Happy Birthday Marilyn!

On June 1, 1936 a star was born. A star that was in dire need of attention and a family that could guide her in the right direction; a direction that lead toward the light of a bright future. Independence was key in the life of a young woman who depended on no one but herself. Growing up, feeling desolate and vulnerable allowed this star to shine her own light and take her inner demons and transform them in to angels that guided her in the direction toward stardom. Struggling with both her inner self and those on the outside was difficult for a young, beautiful and talented girl, but she wanted to become someone regardless of her background. She wanted to take the criticism and the hate that surrounded her and use that as her mold for self perfection. She was never entirely satisfied with herself (as no artist ever really is), but as time moved on, she grew up into a worldly icon. She graced the covers of magazines and television screens around the world and growing up, I wanted to be her more than anything. Me along with everyone else. She inspired me in many ways to take my talents (like she did) and just RUN with them! Run into a field of opportunities and passions and spread my love for them all around me like some sort of garden. She dreamed a thousand dreams, but she wanted them more than anyone else. Just like me.

Today is what would have been Marilyn Monroe's 85th birthday.

 My idol, my love, my favorite woman... Happy Birthday Marilyn!

Hope you're celebrating wherever you are because baby, I am <3

Midnight in Tuscany

 

I often drift and dream about a life past the city lights and congestion, where music suitable to my mindset drifts outside store doors and onto cobbled streets. I often see myself engaged in the reality of the more-to-life state of mind and I put myself there every day. When days seem too hot to run in or too cold to enjoy nature’s gifts, I do what I was born to do: write. I write about what life would be like if fresh bread from the town bakery filtered the air instead of smoke, or if wind chimes aided to my presence instead of car horns or screaming babies. I prefer to create stories with my thoughts and fantasies, over my reality; it’s a more attractive reflection of what I am. This story which is what I call life, is a never ending storytelling process of the mind that although keeps changing, cannot go back and be erased. As a writer, I tend to contemplate about my past and recreate situations that I can smile about instead of frown. For 25 years of my life, I have sought out my passion as a writer and in turn, have only started to begin this long, strenuous and although lonely journey, it is still my journey and it is filled with adventure and drive. Part of my drive came from a very young age where writing was my only escape and has long since turned into my profession where I am allowed to wake up every day and embrace this gift because in reality, it isn‘t a profession/job but more of a fixation; something I was born to do. Part of my drifting is to seek those who are dreamers as myself and encourage and enlighten them to take that step forward and thrust into a world of words and expression. As a 6th grade Language Arts teacher, I have found it enthralling that a large amount of my students want to carry on their passion as I did and write books. After a few of my students bought my self-published poetry book, I had realized that it wasn’t only because I had introduced them to a world of poetry, but because they looked at me and realized that at this tender age, I am limitless. They saw the fervor in my eyes whenever I taught them poetry and other styles of writing and embraced my love for words. They continuously embrace the kaleidoscope of colors I forever install into their brains when I show them what beautiful ways you can say the simplest things. With dreams of fulfilling this within adults in a college-sized classroom and non-physically through the text of my novels, it is with great dignity that I attempt to bring forth those talents, who like me, think outside the box and onto paper. It was when the warm, hazy California air squeezed its way through the palm trees, did I see another side of what my dreams allowed me to see. It wasn’t the gentle sway of the palm trees, the sounds of nearby airplanes jetting across the sky or even the rumbling of the streetcar tires on the pavement that aided to my attention, but of the friendly smiles that carelessly spread across the faces of strangers I won’t ever remember that brought me to a new surface of writing. To write about a smile is like writing about how fast your heart felt when you smelled the cologne or perfume of your love as they walked past you. I had written about something so obscure as that before. And that’s where another part of me started to believe that there was more to life than my congest city streets. It’s something I think about while I sit back under the summer sun, and drink my cold and sweet glass of familiar. One of the things I have often thought about was using my passion and love for writing and utilizing that toward something I take part in pretty often; wine drinking. Wine itself is like literature. If it’s classic and makes you feel expressive and speak in poetics, than you know it’s worth giving yourself up to. Italy is a place where I will be able to look inside my glass as I sit on the corner at the café and up at the sky and say, “I can drift and dream forever, but it’s the reality of my dreams that will always keep me writing.”

Ars Amatoria

Or, So Be It.

Scheduled to run Wednesday, May 11th through Sunday, May 15th at the American Theatre of Actors in NY, "Ars Amatoria" or "So Be It" is an intense yet dramatic and dark-comedic off-Broadway play about 3 men, 1 woman and several controversial topics, one focusing most of it's content on that of abortion. Directed by Laurie Rae Waugh and written by Grace Fishman, "Ars Amatoria" tells the story of a desperate and divorced young mother of 2, who turns to her adopted brother, past ex-lover and possible future-companion for money in order to get an abortion, after being moneyless from paying alimony and emotionally scarred from her previous relationship. After finding out that she is pregnant from a man she had a one-night stand with while she was in an open-marriage, she turns to the three men in her life who she feels will not only understand her position, but would be willing to partake in an action for a sensible reason. Filled with controversy, this play focuses on topics ranging from the simplistic notion of love to the complex demeanor of life's courses.

During the show, I very much enjoyed the performance of adopted brother, Jeb, played by James Rieser. Rieser was an intellectually stimulating actor that not only provided insight and discernment to the play, but also a lighthearted air that almost refreshed the serious and controversial topic of abortion. Rieser's articulation and projecting vocal quality set a mood of comfort and understanding within his character. His heartfelt reactions were apparent at the beginning, climax and end of the play and his gestures, movement and business was indeed, suitably executed and well understood. Rieser's proper relationship with the other actors on stage allowed a sensible tone to be set in the atmosphere. Both orally and visually, Rieser provided a concerning and eloquent believability to his character Jeb and in turn, made Jeb likeable and distinguished.

I would also like to discuss the performance of ex-lover, Keith, played by Christopher Spurrier. Spurrier was a delightful addition who added charisma and consistency to "Ars Amatoria." His interpretation of the now rich and successful man of inheritance was beautifully played as Spurrier's expression and verbalization clearly made it's way up the ladder as the days progressed. His comfort level and gestures provided the audience with a deeper insight to Keith's past as opposed to his new self. Having been his first time on stage in an off-Broadway play, Spurrier's ability to mold Keith into a believable and approachable character was implausible. His movement around the stage was natural and essential and his reactions to certain conversations were authentic. Spurrier was very reassuring and favored, and like Rieser, was endearingly lighthearted and sensible. The audience interacted well with this new face as sounds of laughter and gestures of sympathy and comprehension filtered across the faces of those intrigued by Spurrier's oral and visual projection. Both appealing and engaging, Christopher Spurrier expanded his talents and set forth his steadfastness adequately.

In addition to the fine work of Rieser and Spurrier, I was also impressed with the technical aspects of the show. With a simplistic yet comfortable setting, the correct mood was appointed for the content of the play. White walls stood behind decorative paintings, while a white couch placed in the center of the stage for the first half of the play, provided a very homey ambiance. The lighting, bright enough to notice the expressions of the actors and the background of the stage, illuminated in a perfect light. Costumes, containing both every day attire and that of  professionalism, allowed the actors to be seen as realistic and practical. Sound effects were directly placed in correct occasions and although were miniscule in the play, were competent. 

After viewing this show 2 out of the 5 days of it being shown (tomorrow being the last day and the 3rd time that I will see it), I would have to say that it was very captivating and well recommended to those who enjoy immense vocabulary, insightful comments that make you contemplate everyday occurrences and a cast of well-rounded actors who are engaged and passionate about their roles. I enjoyed this production and anticipate tomorrow's show to be just as delightful and enthralling as the prior performances.



*If you are interested in going to tomorrow's last show, it is at the American Theatre of Actors located at 314 W. 54th street between 8th and 9th Ave. in NY. Show starts at 3 p.m. and tickets are $15 at the door!*

Proud to be an American

Last night was one night I will probably never forget. Last night was the night the world found out that Osama bin laden was killed by US forces. I was lucky enough to be in NY last night and headed to Ground Zero with my boyfriend who lives in that same area. Surrounding us were well over 150 people singing patriotic songs in unison, waving American flags of all sizes, screaming, yelling, clapping, spraying champagne all over the place and taking hundreds of pictures of this amazing sight. At one point throughout the night (or early morning because it was about 12 am), two men decided to climb a street pole and stand atop the crowd waving a tattered American flag before shaking and opening a bottle of champagne across the sea of faces (see photo below). Unbeknownst to us, we had no idea what it would be like... and our assumptions were right on target. We stood, in each others arms, in front of one of the towers that isn't nearly finished, with it's bright lights shining on the happy faces of people who were celebrating their patriotism, their sense of victory and tears of relief and hope, was the highlight of my night. I was able to look around me and look up at the faces of those who felt almost blessed to have been alive to celebrate something so epic and thought, I clearly remember what happened on September 11, 2001 and here I am on May 1, 2011 at the same spot where over 3,000 people died and I felt my throat swell up with feelings I did not know of. I held onto him tight and looked up at the night sky whose lights reflected off of the heavens above and although I couldn't see the faces of all of those innocent people who passed away and left their friends and families with nothing but memories, I saw something more. I saw a night sky filled with dreams fulfilled. These dreams, whether big or small, have been floating across the universe for 10 years; dreams of wanting something more than just revenge. Dreams of wanting peace and comfort and contentment, were answered. 

I was very lucky to have been there last night. To be a part of something so heart rendering- I will not forget. Let us remember those brave and courageous who fought til the very end to save others and themselves as well as those who wanted nothing more than to live... to say good-bye to their family and friends. You will be remembered forever...

I am Proud to be an American.

 

A view of one of the towers from Ground Zero that is still being worked on, 

and nonetheless shining across the sky

 

Ground Zero Celebration/Party

 

Two men standing on top of a street pole waving the American flag at Ground Zero celebrating the death of bin laden and more importantly, those who fought for our country! Champagne, people singing patrotic songs, hundreds of people and tears. I won't ever forget this night... And I was SO thankful to be there to witness this celebration of happiness.

He's Reely Something

On February 22, I wrote an entry, "Whatever You Want Your Pen Name to Echo," that spoke about a true talent; a man with a dream bigger than his own heart beat. Christopher Spurrier (and I might have said this before), is a man who will stop at nothing to become the greatest of the great and a man that I admire and look up to because of his diligence and eccentricity. Having known such a talent, I would like to share with you his acting reel that he created himself. This video shows his diversity and ability to not only explore his true talent through various roles, but it also demonstrates his creativity and ingenuity-- not something many people acquire. Don't forget to visit his website as well for more information on this upcoming superstar... because let me tell you, he is REELY something ;)

To Write Love On Her Arms

Happy Free Love Day Everyone!

Free Love Day is a day that promotes awareness of depression and suicide, as well as to advocate a lifestyle of unconditional love.

If you didn't know this, depression is one of the leading conditions that lead to suicide. Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the United States, and for every suicide, there are 11 attempts made. Suicide can occur at any age ranging from child to adult and the scary part is that we don't know who wants to, who has tried to or who will do it.

There are countless reasons why anyone would think to do this and even more reasons why some are brave enough to go through with it. They CAN be saved. One of the many answers to this is LOVE. Today, en lieu of this day, here is what love means: "Love means an action and decision to unconditionally practice patience, kindness, and humbleness towards people. Sharing your story with people, because we all have one. To open up so no one feels alone." I couldn't have said it better myself. 

If you're anyone like me, the mere thought or sensation of love brings such an uncontrollably overwhelming feeling from within, that it causes others around you to feel just that. With my heart on my sleeve, I live to observe a lifestyle of nothing but love, and you should too. 

How do you do that? Here are a few of my personal opinions...

• Ask someone how they're feeling today
• Tell someone how much you love them
• Show someone how much you love them
• Do something on a whim out of love because you WANT to
• Treat everyday like it's a sort of... Valentine's Day, if you will (and no, that doesn't necessarily mean buy whoever it is calorie infested chocolates and sweet little Hallmark cards all of the time, but once in a blue moon do something sweet and loving to someone -- anyone you love because you LOVE them that much)
• Spend quality time with someone you love (especially if they're having a bad day -- they probably need you more than anyone else will at the moment)
• Compliment someone today (tell them how pretty/handsome they look today, how they look really great with their hair that certain way, how happy they seem, how lucky you are to have them in your life, how they have changed your life in some way, etc)
• LOVE FREELY - there is always enough to go around :)

So today, to celebrate Free Love Day, draw/put a heart on your wrist to signify that you will wear your heart on your sleeve and live to observe a lifestyle of love. Today, we WANT to change the world and make people aware of what depression can do. Suicide should not be an option. No one should ever feel the need to take their life for any reason what so ever. No one should have to feel so bad about themselves that they would want to take their own life. You only have one life to live so live it and fill it with LOVE!

I wear my heart on my sleeve because I love with a love that is more than love <3

Laughter in the Rain

I decided to do a double post today because I felt the need to write about something that I feel very strongly about.

Today I have decided to sign up for some VERY important causes that have affected me personally throughout my years of living and I couldn't be any happier to be a part of something so special and so important to me. The reason why I am sharing this is because I want to make these charities aware to the public and inform you of the many ways that you can help in being a part of something worth looking into.  Although there are many more walks/runs that I will be looking into I wanted to share the following dates/charities that I am going to participate in.

May 15 : AIDS Walk in NY
June 4-5: Out of the Darkness Overnight Walk for Suicide Prevention
October 14-15: Avon Walk for Breast Cancer

I have always been involved in donating and participating whether it's by walking or running, for good causes. Ever since I could remember I have always wanted to be a part of something bigger in my life. I don't know if it's due to my caring and loving nature, or because I much rather give my hard-earned money AND time (whether to walk, run or fund raise) to a great cause, or both. I have been a part of so many causes ranging from Save the Big Cats Foundation, Make-A-Wish-Foundation of NJ, HUMC, American Red Cross, Save the Earth, Carlos Negron Memorial Fund, and many more.

My first charity that I signed up for today is the AIDS Walk. The AIDS Walk in NY is slowly approaching and I decided to form a team entitled: Laughter in the Rain. Anyone can join and anyone can donate as much money as they would like to. I have asked both my parents, some family members and friends to join my team and walk 6.2 miles with me throughout Central Park so that I can walk to remember someone very important in my life who spent the majority of his life just Laughing and being a happy soul. I have decided to form a team and register as a Star Walker. As a Star Walker, my goal is to raise $1,000 or more - the higher my goal is, the more money I know I can raise. If you would like to help me/join my team in memory of my uncle and those gone but not forgotten, please do so and let me know so I can personally thank you :). WE can make a difference together. Tread lightly with me on a day in which the celebration of sadness will not be, but of happiness and love.

I Love You M.O. <3

Run, Rabbit, Run!

The microphones were set, the booths were stocked with some of the finest apparel for men and women, the dressing rooms were brightly lit, the scent of coffee was lingering in the air and the only sound that could be heard was that of laughter and soft treading of the feet... in sneakers of all brands. Adidas. Brooks. Saucony. Asics. New Balance. Mizuno. Zensah. Garmin. Vibram. I had never been so overwhelmed with running apparel exhibitors in one room in my life. For a runner, this was indeed a sight for sore eyes. I was like a kid at a candy store - eyes enlarging with amazement the deeper I set my foot into the dwelling, and all I could think of was, "Man, this is almost as good as  being at Disneyland." And boy, was I right.

It was 8:50 in the morning when I set foot inside the JackRabbit NYC Running Show yesterday, April 22nd.  I had signed up to volunteer as a worker during the show about a week or two ago and I was just as excited to walk around and take a look at everything and listen to the guest speakers, than I was to work. With over 10 guest speakers, over 35 exhibitors, and an edifice filled with inspiration, I felt right at home. There is something to be said about being in an (extremely) large room surrounded by runners of all ages and types, clad in their running sneakers and fit bodies, with their own stories to tell and hearing them speak about past races, upcoming races, what they love to wear when they run, what they've accomplished (or rather, what they would like to accomplish) and more. There is something to be said about these people. They have heart. They are goal oriented and just... blissful. I've seen people with passion in their eyes do things that truly make them feel whole (and not to mention sparkle-eyed shoppers spend tons of money on things that are new in the market) and it just doesn't compare to what I've seen in my 11 years as a runner (or yesterday for that matter). It was such a beautiful sight to see runners carrying around JackRabbit bags filled with gear. And I'm sad to say that I was not one of them, but my heart, too, was happy to see them just as happy as I would have been if I had the opportunity (and the money) to buy some of the finest gear in the industry.

Working the dressing room at this show was quiet the experience. I not only met some pretty amazing and motivated runners, but it filled my heart with joy to see many of these athletes walk out of the dressing rooms with a smile and a, "I'll take this, thank you." I would have to say about 3 or 4 people decided not to buy what they tried on and to me, that says a lot. During the show, I had the privilege to shy away from my station and watch a 25-minute information session by 2004 Olympic Runner, Grant Robison, on good form running. He was one of the most knowledgeable and down to earth people that I was more than excited to watch speak and he gave some real helpful tips on how to make running more comfortable, less painful and most importantly, more enjoyable. So in turn, I will say, Grant Robison : You Rock! Keep up the great work. With your tips, you have made me a better runner already.

Working the JackRabbit Running Show was one of the best 6 hours I have had in a while and if I could do it again, I most definitely would. If you just so happened to miss yesterday's JackRabbit NYC Running Show, don't fret! Today is the 2nd (and last) day where the show WILL go o! It goes on from 10 am - 6 pm and covers another amazing schedule of guest speakers (with various informative topics that are extremely helpful) as well as a layout of exhibitors that, if I may add, will be seling some pretty amazing gear. So head on over (with $10 to enter) and a smile on your face and turn this rainy day into a sunny one!

JackRabbit NYC Running SHow 

Have You Hugged a Vegetarian Today?

If you haven't, you sure as heck should! And if you have, well, good for you!

You might ask why. I'll tell you this much. Hugging a vegetarian is like hugging ... well, me! And if you KNOW me you know I give the best hugs EVER! They're long and sometimes real tight and warm and yeah, so what? I'm a little on the thin side so I guess bony would be another good descriptive word BUT that doesn't mean they're not good :)

This entry has nothing to do with hugging vegetarians, but I thought I might put that out there for you folks. Because I have already shared with you some of my hobbies, accomplishments and dreams, I figure I add a little something different to the mix. I for one love to cook. I mean Love Love Love. LOVE to cook. It puts me in another state and allows me to use my right-brained creativeness. Being a vegetarian also allows me to take my love for veggies and make things I never thought I'd ever like or be able to make for that matter. Here is something I tried for the first time today and while it was a ton of fun to make, I wanted to share my Vegetable Lasagna recipe with you!

I went to the market and bought some lasagna noodles, mushrooms, yellow and green squash, carrots, chopped spinach, ricotta, low fat mozzarella, your favorite pasta sauce and oregano. In a bowl, I mixed a jar of my favorite sauce with some oregano and grated carrots. In another bowl, I mixed a container of ricotta, 2 eggs and chopped spinach. In a glass dish I put some of my sauce mix on the bottom, layered it with 2 lasagna noodles and topped it with my ricotta mix. I then placed some thinly sliced yellow and green squash and sliced mushrooms on top.

After you layer the veggies, you sprinkle on some shredded mozzarella and grated Parmesan cheese. Then you place 2 more lasagna noodles on top and you do the whole thing all over again! And when you're done with your second veggie layer, you place 2 more lasagna noodles on top, some more sauce and cheese and you're all ready to go. This is what mine looked like before placing it in the oven.

 

You place this baby in the oven at 350 degrees and cook for about 45 minutes and wah lah: You have a delicious veggie lasagna!

But what happens when you look around and see all of these extra ingredients hanging out? What do you do? You don't want to throw it out. You might not have enough to make another lasagna. Don't fret!

 

You make veggie lasagna rolls! Same rule applies EXCEPT you don't layer.. you just roll! Take one lasagna noodle, place some of your leftover sauce on it, some ricotta mix, some green and yellow squash and mushrooms and roll that bad boy!

 

Now, I had about 3 lasagna noodles left (because I only boiled 9) so I was able to make 3 rolls. When you've got your rolls all set, top them with some more sauce and cheese and there you have it, some delish veggie lasagna rolls!

 

I put these bad boys in a Tupperware and put them in the fridge for lunch tomorrow or even dinner. If you have friends or family members who are into tasty food, you can even share them! It's easy and super delicious and healthy and if you are a veggie lover like me, I will guarantee that you will enjoy this!

Oh, and don't forget... Take the time to hug a vegetarian at some point this week. It's healthy ;)

Kindle Your Heart!

A wise man once said, 

"Success is a state of mind. If you want success, start thinking of yourself as a success."

What is success? Is it following in your parents footsteps of them wanting you to become a doctor or a lawyer? Is it getting accepted into graduate school so that you can obtain your MA or your PhD? Is it winning the lottery and never having to work again as long as you have that money in your possession? 

 Success means something to everyone and is something everyone (or almost everyone) wants. 

To me, success is wanting something, anything, so bad (whether it's out of reach or right under your nose) that you are willing and ready to work the hardest that you can in order to get it. It's looking at yourself in the mirror and smiling at the successful YOU you are even if you're the only one who sees it. I have many dreams and goals of becoming one of the worlds most recognized and respected writers, but I can't become one if I just say it and dream it. There are millions of people in this world who want to do things and don't act upon it. Success stems from actions and executions. I haven't always been the most confident person, but when it comes to my writing I would have to say in modesty, that I believe that I am a successful writer because I feel it and know it deep inside. It's as simple as this... if you want to be successful you have to be willing to do the things that the failures don't like to do.

Not too long ago, I had one of my closest friends send me a news link about a woman who attempted to sell her books to publishing companies and repeatedly failed due to rejections, and she decided to translate them into e-book form and is now a success! I have thought of doing this once before, but it slipped my mind. With technology being so popular and constantly growing, it's sad to say that a lot of the bookstores that I have lived in many times (Barnes and Noble and Borders, for example) have been closing down because people just won't buy books anymore. Instead, people have been going online and purchasing/reading e-books and buying Kindle's and iPads and all of those hand-held book reading devices to replace those precious books that I will NEVER stop buying. But like I mentioned above, if you want to be successful you have to think of yourself as a success, so in turn, I have decided to follow in the steps of this determined and talented woman and do just the same! My published paperback, "Down the Rabbit Hole," can ALSO be bought and read as an e-book on Amazon.com and is readily available to YOU on your Kindle! What an accomplishment this has been for me and I am so excited I had to share. I long for success and will continue to obtain it with every idea in mind that I will never be anything else other than that!

Thank you for your support and to those who do decide to purchase it for their kindle (the link is below), I will NOT let you down. Also, be on the lookout for the sequel coming in both paperback AND e-book. Stay tuned.

Down the Rabbit Hole for your Kindle!

Made For Another World

 

I've got this deep desire inside of me that no experience in this world can satisfy and the only explanation to this phenomenon is that I was made for another world.

Follow My Lead

Close your eyes. Don't peak. Listen to the serene sounds of silence caused by sadness.

Now imagine this.

It's frigid. It's an uncomfortable numbness of the limbs caused by a mindless self indulgence of confusion and disappointment. There is a feeling of this. That there IS nothing else. At least so it is being thought. 

Time is being spent away in the corner behind a porcelain tub surrounded by thoughts of catastrophic reveries. And then it is time to be aware of something - that things could always be worse. 

But can it?

And then there is a realization that although love is being filtered throughout the veins, the tears that cause the eyes to swell -- that splash -- crash faster than a new found admiration.That can be okay... 

For some people.


It hurts, doesn't it? To know that after everything... the hard work, the passion, the intensity... the drive... can so easily disappear when one little thing goes wrong. One turn is being made in the wrong direction and you're lost. When one thing makes you realize that you're doing something that you probably  shouldn't be doing because it's not making you as happy as you'd think you'd be. Unfortunate.


Keep your eyes closed. You feel that? It's gloom. Doom? That's a little too dark for me.


Now open your eyes. You see that? 

There's a girl who wishes to be free. There's a girl who looks just like me.

With This Spring, I Thee Wed

It sure is an amazing thing to be able to wake up in the morning and have the sun be bright against the backdrop of the sky. As Spring approaches, I grow more and more anticipated with the wonders of the earth that come to bloom during this season. The trees and flowers are sweet smelling and vibrant in color, the clouds remain as cotton balls painted across the sky and the wind, mildly warm and fresh remind me of a time when all I ever wanted to do was be outside. I strive for this month (or even April) to be the month where I can be that girl who wants nothing more than to lay out on a grassy field, looking up the sky and counting every beautiful thing I can see. And the first thing I'd notice is that person laying next to me, sharing my dreams, my adventures and my happiness under the sun.  What joy fills my heart the warmer the days grow. I couldn't be any happier for this month to come and go.

Cheers to an amazing Spring. Compliments of my fluttering heart and hopeful endeavors.

Elvis said it...

And I've learned throughout the years of loving people, that it is the most extreme emotion that one can suffer from, that one can die with, that one cannot live without and that one can be ever so happy as to never want to live with any other emotion. 

It careens through my veins up my legs and into my core exploding with a spark at its tip that transcends a whole new fire of rebirth. I would have to consider this feeling something everlasting that although has brought great grief to my life, has also brought me new beginnings and exciting futures filled with adventure, resonating echos of laughter and an explosion of hope and amazement.

Love is all I ever wanted to experience in this new life and I am so thankful to be able to love and be loved because without that feeling, I don't know where I'd be mentally and emotionally.

As a young woman, I have yet to experience so much more that love has to offer, but I will say that the feeling I have acquired so far is so immense, that it has made me a believer; a happy soul. I don't ever want it to end because it really does liven up the body and mind and creates another kind of being that lives inside of you. A being vulnerable yet reserved to its surprises and restless yet comforting. 

That's the kind of healthy you want to be. That's the kind of healthy I live for.

Live like it's your last breath.

Laugh like you'll never be able to laugh again.

Love with all of your heart.  

And remember...

An Oldie But a Goodie

For those lucky souls born into an era of pure innocence and entertainment, remember when making decisions where deciphered with a simple "eeny-meeny-miny-mo," nobody was prettier than Mom, kisses made scrapes and bruises all better, the local hangout was at the diner down the street, catching fireflies occupied an entire evening AND it was fun, going steady was a HUGE deal, bobby socks made any outfit look good, 5-cents was able to get you a cup of coffee or Coke in a bottle and ice cream was 5-cents a scoop, admission to a Sunday matinee was bought with can wrappers, can goods and old saved bottle caps, people sat around their record player and listened to their 45s and LPs, you couldn't wait to watch American Bandstand, milk was delivered to your doorstep in bottles, girls and boys spent all night getting ready for those sock hops in their school gymnasium, the worst thing you could do in school was chew gum, smoke in bathrooms or flunk a test, you were able to leave your car unlocked with the keys in the glove box or ignition and that was okay, drag races and drive-ins were one of the most exciting things to do, Dairy Queen had the best cherry cokes and shakes, the thing to fear was your parents and grandparents and not drugs, gangs or shootings, and when moonpies and RC cola was the perfect snack?

Seeing as though I was born 36 years after that era, I can't say I remember. Although, I really wish I did.

I have always said, since I was about 5 or 6, that I was born into the wrong era. I grew up in my household sitting in my room, on my floor surrounded by my parent's 45s and LPs, listening to endless tracks on my very own record player that was given to me at that prime age. I looked up to artists like Dion and the Belmonts and Elvis Presley, hoping that one day everything would be as it was.... when one was able to take a drive in that 56 Buick Special to the local diner and grab a shake and play a song on that jukebox, and just BE. I envy those who were able to experience the 50s. Although, I wasn't born in that era, I carry it with me in my heart everywhere I go... always. My music player has more bands from the 50s than modern day artists (I prefer The Everly Brothers and The Temptations over today's bands like Fall Out Boy or Foo Fighters), my taste in clothes stems from the pointy glasses, skirts and saddle shoes that were ever so popular (I take dresses and saddles over jeans and boots any day), my love for cars comes from the classic and detailed body shapes of the 51 Cadillac and 55 Corvette which I would take over any modern day car (which I am not a fan of... today's cars that is) and if I had a choice, I would have milk with my dinner instead of Pepsi, and moonpies over chocolate molten lava cake (boy, have we come a long way).

There aren't nearly enough 50s styled diners (with the exception of Johnny Rocket's which I AM a fan of, but it isn't nearly as good as Nifty Fifties in Turnersville, NJ which is unfortunately nowhere near my abode). I can't even bare to imagine rolling up in a deuce in front of a diner, excitement ringing in my ears and a twinkle in my eye, as I catch a glimpse of the rest of them parked out front with their drivers and dates clad in leather jackets and dresses.

My obsession with the 50s and everything associated with it, is none other than love. I will spend the rest of my life appreciating and admiring everything from this golden era and bringing it back with my natural love for the music, clothes, cars, styles, etc. In the future I plan on opening up my own 50s style diner named after my parents (who were fortunate enough to experience the 50s) and owning a home that's an exact replica of a classic with a checkered kitchen floor, sofas with spindle legs, big starburst wall clocks, boomerang-shaped coffee tables, old fashioned telephones, and a jukebox. And I'm going to love my life... maybe a bit more than I do now ;)

Whatever You Want Your Pen Name to Echo

There are no combination of words for me to say when it comes to true talent and eccentricity. I know several people who exhibit that kind of talent that deserve to be marketed and presented to the world for recognition. It's those people who take their passion and drive, and put that into their work and in return, gain the acknowledgment they need in order to triumph. Sure, there are thousands of people who act and model and sing and dance, and do it very well. And not only do they do it well, but they do it because of the fame and fortune that comes along with it. But doing something well, and because of the fame and fortune unfortunately doesn't get them very far. Those remembered; those legends do it with heart. I for one do that in my writing and my modeling. Don't get me wrong, it would be spectacular if some kind of fame came with it (only because I want the world to know where I came from and how hard I worked to get there), but at the same time if you don't do what you love with heart, than it is almost impossible to be great.

One of the things that I love to do is advocate those in my life who, like me, work with heart and just have fun doing what they love and what they were born to do. This person that I am advocating is very dear to me. He is full of ambition and holds deep inside of him a bag of aspirations that he continually unties when he is creating his art form. He has come a long way and deserves this recognition because I admire his diligence and zeal, and truly believes in himself the way he believes in me and my craft. With a sparkle in his eye and a name like Chris Spurrier, this upcoming actor is filled with ingenuity, perception and fortitude, and more. He encompasses this brilliance in his work that isn't apparent even in some of today's Hollywood's stars. All I'm saying is, watch out for this talent because i know in my heart, he WILL make it on the big screen.

Here are 3 of his videos - Please check them out and comment on them (critique is always appreciated and valued. It's what molds talents into becoming that much more better at their craft).

Whatever You Want to Hear

Pen Name

Echo of Silence

Thank you for your time and support. It is greatly appreciated! It is important to recognize true talent in the making. Never give up and do what you love regardless of the outcome. If he can do it, you can too. Keep an open mind and an open heart, and take that talent (even if you feel like you're not good enough) and run with it. Straight to the stars!

A Star is Born

Marilyn Monroe thought it. Ginger Rogers did it. Audrey Hepburn succeeded it in. Billie Holiday sang it. Jean Harlow wanted it. Jayne Mansfield said it. Greta Garbo cried for it. 

What do I and these women have in common?

One word: DREAMS.

We've all got dreams. Dreams of becoming the next Betty Grable - The Pin-Up Girl. Or even Kim Novak - Hollywood's Starlet. Maybe even Sarah Vaughan - The American Jazz Singer. Something all of these legends had in common was that not only did they dream, but they did. They took their dreams; their talents, disregarded what other people said or thought, and did what they wanted to do. I am a firm believer that we were all put on this earth with a purpose... with a talent for us to find and utilize and make known to the world. Whether it's an artist, a model, an actor, a singer or dancer, or even an acrobat. Whatever it is, it's worth something and it's beautiful.

Because I am an old soul (and definitely born in the wrong era, may I add) I look up to many of these women. I can only imagine how difficult it was to be a woman in the 20s-50s struggling to be an actress, singer, model [pin-up girl], etc. Between the fear and rejection that society constantly brought upon these women, I don't know which is worse. And yet they STILL managed to master the skill of becoming that starlet that graced the camera and the walls of many people, and even today, continue to do so. That is what you call a Dream.

As a woman in today's society, it is still a difficult task to become that someone. There is constant competition and rejection, but that is part of life. This may sound cliche, but if it were easy everyone would do it. This is what I think: Whatever your dream is, if you want it (and I mean, real bad) and you're willing to work hard for it - you CAN and WILL get it.

I've got lots of dreams too. I want to become a great, well known writer known for my novels, stories, poetry and inspirational words that have changed lives in the smallest way possible. I want to become a model, who graces billboards, magazines, television screens, and the walls of people who see me and think: She is indeed a hardworking, independent starlet of this era.I want to be the next Greta Gable - The Girl With The Million Dollar Legs. I want to be the next Marilyn Monroe - The Most Celebrated Of All.

I've been doing a lot of thinking. A lot of working. A lot of shooting. And the more I accomplish, the more I know I will get to that special place. All I know is this:

"There must be thousands of girls sitting alone like me, dreaming of becoming a movie star. But I'm not going to worry about them. I'm dreaming the hardest." 

-Marilyn Monroe

And I won't EVER stop dreaming the hardest. I've got people in my life (you know who you are) who believe in me and constantly tell me how great I am and how I'm going to go places and become someone big. And in my heart, I know it will happen. It's been happening slowly. I just can't see it because I'm too busy working toward a bigger and better future aside from raising my talent privately.

My inspirations. My muses. My reason for succeeding.

 Marilyn Monroe

 

Ginger Rogers

 

Audrey Hepburn

 

Jean Harlow

 

Jayne Mansfield

 Greta Garbo

 

Betty Grable

 

Kim Novak

*Me!*

Wanderful Wanderlusting

Traveler. Wanderer. Adventurer. Expeditionist. Vagabond. Sightseer. Journeyer. Roamer. Explorer. Excursionist. Whatever you want to call it, I want to be it.  I want to travel the world with my camera and companion beside me, capturing the beauty and refinement the world beyond this city has to offer. 

I want to admire the kaleidoscope of colorful lights embracing the sky at night in Moscow, Russia. 

I want my feet to kiss the cobbled stone steps that lead to a town of magic in Robin Hood's Bay, England

I want to lay down and be engulfed in a sea of purple flowers, gently brushing against my skin in Fiordland National Park, New Zealand.

I want to be blinded by the red leaves against the backdrop of the white sky in a Wintery British Columbia, Canada.

I want to dip my fingers and toes inside the smooth waters of Lake Olden, Norway. 

I want to wanderlust. For the rest of my life.

The Last Lions

After attending the VIP special screening of "The Last Lions" in Chelsea followed by a Q&A with both filmmakers Dereck and Beverly Joubert, and narrator, Jeremy Irons, I must say I was deeply captivated and impressed with its entirety. The story alone encompasses an incredible insight to the daily struggles and risks that need to be taken in in order to survive. This emotionally stimulating yet heart-rendering tale is, in truth, quite the attention getter providing the audience with a sound and picture quality that put [us] in Botswana both physically and mentally. A wildlife adventure would be an understatement if one had to describe what Ma di Tau and her cubs had to relinquish.

This movie made me aware of just how humanistic these animals can be when it comes to protection, survival, loss and gain and love. Not one time did I get bored or divert my eyes away from the screen. I took a second to look to my left over at the long row of people who sat looking up at the big screen before them, almost catching a glimpse of hope in their eyes as they awaited for the next scene to play out what would happen next to this struggling family. I remember smiling to myself at just how engaged the audience was when certain scenes illustrated their way of life. I remember thinking: These beautiful animals, who have minimized in size over the past 50 years from 450,000 to as few as 20,000 are astonishingly amazing in every way. Even when they fight and kill. I am still rendered speechless at just how unbelievably proud they are of who they become with age and experience. Thanks to the Joubert's and Irons, we got a "real" feel of just how captivating this entire journey was - 2 years in the making.

Dereck and Beverly Joubert were two of the most down to earth people I could have had the privilege of being in the same room as. They answered each question clearly and even hung around for a bit afterward to speak to some of the audience members and/or people they know. I, of course, was too shy to even say Hi, but after realizing how friendly and approachable they were, it eased the tension floating in the air around me. I had asked Beverly if she was thinking of returning back to the land where they had filmed Ma di Tau and her cub for a sequel, and she kindly said that she didn't think they would (but who knows, right?). Jeremy Irons, well known actor known for his role in the voice of Scar from "The Lion King," was also present which was a nice surprise after finding out who he really was. He too was a helpful soul who provided humor and the like to the Q&A portion proceeding the film. After much communication, we followed the them down to the 2nd floor lobby and said good-bye as we walked off thinking of a million other questions we could have asked. It's an overwhelming experience that I am PROUD to say that I would do it again in a heartbeat.

Because I am such an avid animal activist, I had the privilege of being a part of this event, so once again:

Thank you National Geographic and Botswana Tourism Board for inviting me to your special screening.  I had the BEST time ever! (And many many thanks for providing the audience with a "travel Botswana" CD that I will most definitely use when I plan my safari trip to Botswana... Which I intend to do a lot sooner than I anticipate).

The diligence and effort placed into this documentary film is unlike any other I have seen. If you have the chance to watch it, WATCH IT. You will NOT regret it. Five Stars!

Watch the Trailer 

Watch The Last Lions trailer on YouTube and National Geographic will contribute $.10 for each viewing until we hit one million views.

Also, please don't forget to visit causeanuproar.org to find out how YOU can help save these beautiful big cats. Thank you!

Ink Not Mink

Rue McClanahan once said, "Cruelty is one fashion statement we can all do without."

I have been an animal rights advocate for as long as I can remember. Spending almost as much time in New York than I do in my own home state of New Jersey, I have seen countless advertisements advising the public on the issue of animal cruelty. PETA is one of those organizations that constantly advertise their take on the issue. I both agree/disagree with some of their findings, but I will say that their campaign against fur is my absolutely favorite. I for one am entirely against using real animal fur as part of a fashion. They need their fur just the same as we need our skin. It makes them who they are the distinguishes them from the rest of the beautiful animals in this world.  That is why I LOVE the campaigns of : "Ink Not Mink."


PETA has had a series of tattooed artists (of all kinds) model their beautifully decorated skin as an advertisement almost suggesting that getting tattooed is the way to go as opposed to wearing fur. Do I think this is a legit message to carry out? Absolutely. I have always wanted to participate in a campaign such as this because it establishes a sort of foundation surrounding the various options one can take to beautify ones fashion or make oneself feel beautiful without having to wear that dead rabbit around your neck.


Tattooed or not, I am here to state my opinion and proudly say that I will never wear real animal fur.

Be comfortable in your own skin and let animals keep theirs.

 

INK NOT MINK!