All That I am After...

I've come to the realization that what truly makes me happy is finding happiness in every little thing that I take part in. Whether it's the kaleidoscope of colors flashing in the dark to the beat of the music kick starting my heart, or the sound of laughter ringing through my ears louder than any conversation I can hear inside of a crowded restaurant, near. It's what makes these perma-lines on my face surrounding my eyes and lips come to life when every muscle senses its time to come together, when I am happy - extraordinaire. No poison-induced injection or animal fat-filled cream will ever stop these lines from forming because when I am old and grey, I will look in the mirror and say, "That is the epitome of happy." These freckles brown will slowly fade into my pouted frown and from behind my murky eyes ascend the nights of teenage disguise, and it will be then that I will recognize that my whole life was filled with me, and him, and them, and her, and everyone I ever allowed to see my eyes minimize and teeth shine. If I can count the lifeless souls I've seen wander the streets all hours of the day in snow and rain and sunshine bright, I'd forget to count past 807. I've learned to love with a love that is more than love - a strangers smile, a friends embrace, an admirers voice, my own reflection, lifes perfection. A time in the shower to swallow shampoo that tastes like the sound of that days true hue, embracing my soul - cleansing my internal need to flow like a river deep, hoping for a life full of laughter with you.